After they survive a traumatic event, many people spend years of their lives struggling because of Parts that are at war within them as a result. They may have:
But something incredible happens when, instead of constantly fighting against these Parts, the trauma victim starts working on understanding them and empathizing with them. It is as though a dramatic shift takes place in who they are and how they function.
When the Parts feel understood, there is no denying the transformation that many people experience. This is all a part of the healing process, but for trauma victims, it is a truly exciting time.
The Battle of the Parts
Most trauma victims find themselves stuck in an endless cycle of having to deal with their various Parts. They constantly feel as though they need to silent them in hopes that one day, they will simply disappear and stop bothering them. But what is actually happening is that the Parts want to be heard.
The childlike Part wants to explain how it felt as a result of the trauma. The protective Part has worries of its own that need to be listened to. The angry Part feels threatened and wants to make sure that does not happen again.
They all have their own stories to tell, but instead of giving them the chance to speak, many trauma victims – and their therapists – spend the majority of their time trying to keep them quiet.
Freeing Good Parts from Bad Roles
It can change everything once a person is able to experience the Self and see the Parts for who and what they really are. When the Parts feel understood, they often fade into the background.
In his book, Introduction to the Internal Family Systems Model, Dr. Richard C. Schwartz discusses what his experience has been when the Parts feel heard and like what they feel matters. He says, “Clients reported that their image and experience of the part changed. It was as if a part had released a burden that, like a computer chip or curse, had been governing its existence.”
With their heavy burdens lifted, many Parts feel liberated. Some begin to express feelings of joy and others are able to rest quietly. There are other Parts that will act in ways that are completely the opposite of what the client experienced previously. For example, a Part that was once very negative can become positive and encouraging.
What is interesting is that we all have Parts, and all of those Parts have their own roles. They are all inner personalities with different jobs, helping us to be more creative, play, relax and enjoy intimacy with other people. Trauma can cause significant damage to the Parts, but the right type of therapy can make a big difference and help with the healing process.
Have you been through a traumatic experience? If so, healing is available to you with proper therapy. Please contact me today to make an appointment.
