Witnessing can be a very important part of trauma therapy for those who want to tell the stories of their traumatic events. But please know that it is not always necessary or helpful for trauma victims to tell their stories. Sometimes there are benefits, and being witnessed is one of them.
The reality is that many people never get the opportunity to tell their stories for one reason or another. Some would rather not tell them, and others just never had the opportunity. Today, I’d like to talk about the power of witnessing to be witnessed and how that can benefit trauma victims.
The Longing to be Heard
For many people, their traumatic events took place during childhood. This was a time in their lives when the small voice they might have had was silenced. The need to be heard is a natural human response, and for a child who was made to carry terrible secrets, that memory is very fresh in their minds.
Very few children are able to tell their stories at the time the abuse happened. Instead, they are made to be quiet about it and even pretend it was not happening, or did not happen. As a result, their longing to be heard was never satisfied when it should have been.
For trauma victims with that need to be heard, being able to tell their stories can be a catalyst in the healing process. But it can still be painful, emotional and difficult. This is why it is something that must be handled with the utmost care.
The Role of the Therapist as a Witness
During the telling of the story, the therapist’s job should be to provide the right kind of support. One of the challenges with telling the story of the abuse is keeping the trauma victim in the here and now. In her book, Healing the Fragmented Selves of Trauma Survivors, by Janina Fisher, she states, “…the wish to tell or be heard does not guarantee that the client can remain fully present in the moment when activated by details of the narrative.”
Research indicates that when a trauma victim tells their story, the narrative itself becomes trauma-related stimuli. It can stimulate the body to respond in alarm, taking the patient back to the time of the event.
That means the therapist has an important job to keep the patient in the here and now. This can be accomplished by continually offering encouragement and reminding the patient that:
- They are listening to the story.
- They are hearing the patient and they believe what they are saying.
- They are listening and they are not shocked, angry or leaving in response.
These moments of recognition are really important and it helps for the patient to be believed regarding what happened to them. That revelation can be so healing during trauma therapy because some patients have never experienced it before. They are, for the first time, witnessing being witnessed.
Begin Trauma Therapy Today
Perhaps you have been struggling for quite some time, but you did not know where to turn for help. I would love to talk with you about how I can assist you. Please contact me for an appointment.
