Many trauma therapists do not know how to lead their clients into the basic understanding of who “I” is. “I” is subjective, and it could mean:
- The part of the person that gets angered easily.
- The part of the person who often succumbs to fear.
- The part of the person that feels ashamed at times.
Yes, people are emotional beings. But those emotions are not always an accurate representation of the person’s whole Self. When using a Parts Model approach to treating trauma, every problematic thought, such as the ones listed above, are treated as a Part, and not an extension of the Self.
Communication From the Parts
Instead of using the word, “I,” modern trauma therapists understand that these difficult messages are coming from the individual’s Parts, and not the Self. For example:
- Which Part has a problem controlling its temper?
- Which Part struggles with feelings of fear?
- Which Part is experiencing shame?
Asking these types of questions gives an opportunity for the Parts to speak up and be heard when they have probably been oppressed for quite some time. These questions evoke curiosity and observations. The trauma victim can still feel their reactions to these feelings, but that feeling is lessened.
What Can Trauma Victims do When Their Parts Communicate?
One of the biggest challenges that trauma victims face is knowing how to respond when their Parts are communicating with them. Most people who have lived through traumatic events will come to think of the communication as just the way they feel. They may think they feel fearful, angry and ashamed, and over time, those feelings become who they are.
Those assumptions need to be challenged, and while the challenging can be led by the therapist, eventually, the trauma victim must issue challenges of his or her own.
It is important for victims to make the shift from calling everything they feel “I” to thinking of those expressions as coming directly from their Parts. Automatic negative interpretations become their go-to, but these individuals can be taught to think in terms of mindful observation instead. This change allows them to just listen to the Parts rather than assuming that the Parts are speaking for the Self.
Trauma victims who focus on their trauma-related emotions will be more triggered by their environments and experience the difficulty of a dysregulated nervous system. Labeling the Parts in a neutral way can help. For example, using terms like Angry Part or Scared Part offers an easy transition into observational behavior.
How Can Trauma Therapy Help?
Trauma therapists who rely on a Parts Model approach can help victims by reframing their difficult emotions and communications from their Parts. People can be taught to just observe what they experience as “I” rather than accepting those hard to manage feelings as just a part of who they are.
If you have experienced a traumatic event, you are not alone, and recovery is possible with the right trauma therapist. This approach has been proven to be effective, and I can help you. Please contact me today to make an appointment.
